Barry Gilder and Jakes Gerwel Address Non-racialism at the Launch of Songs and Secrets
The launch of Barry Gilder’s remarkable memoir, Songs and Secrets, was celebrated in a fascinating discussion with Jakes Gerwel, Vice-Chancellor of Rhodes University, at The Book Lounge last week. This memorable event ended on a high note as the author took out his guitar and sang to the assembled guests.

Introducing Gilder to the crowd, Mervyn Sloman recalled his surprise in the early days of the The Book Lounge when he’d recognised on TV the “quiet guy with the beard that hung out regularly at the back of the shop, who was none other than ‘super snoop’ and ‘spy boss’ testifying against Jackie Selebi.”
Gilder said he’d written for an international audience initially, but kept foremost in his mind those who’d shared his story. Many who read the book in its inceptual stage, who had lived the narrative firsthand, expressed the belief that it was time to tell their story. “That’s why I wrote the book,” he said, “not to tell tales of derring-do, but to share the real experience of going into exile, of going into MK training, of coming home and trying to turn apartheid around. And how damn difficult it has been to turn it around!”
Gerwel referred to the beautiful image of memory in the book’s introduction. When he asked Gilder how he had accomplished this, Gilder revealed that his memory is terrible, but some things have remained with him. “The book is built around those stuck memories. I did something very mechanical, some would say anal, by creating a timeline on a spreadsheet. I read books on the period. I went through my passports, read others’ memoirs, jotted down things. I had no notes. We didn’t keep notes in the ANC underground, in MK. In intelligence services and government I kept no notes. But I interviewed a number of people who shared the story with me and made notes from the interviews. Memory is a very strange thing,” he said.
As he talked to the people who crossed his story line, enquiring when they went into exile, when they came home, the connections between memories returned. “At some point I had to stop my research, and record my experience of the experience.”
Gerwel and Gilder then addressed the issue of non-racialism. Gilder revealed how had left South Africa very conscious of his colour and history: “In the MK camps I was a strange phenomenon…in 1979 I was the only white person in the camp. I went in, and forgot I was white. I’m not being precious about this. Honestly forgot I was white. There were no mirrors, no others to congregate with. I became me. Everyone else became them. That got me into trouble later…”
Gerwel also quizzed the author about the atrocities in MK camps, which are not mentioned in his book. “At my time in the camps,” replied Gilder, “there were no atrocities that I was aware of. Later, there was a mutiny. I was in intelligence, but in Botswana, and wasn’t close enough to understand what was going on. In researching this book I learned about them, but at the time, they were gossip and hearsay and drinking tales.” Gilder explained how, as he read about the mutinies and the problems reported about the conditions and food during that time, he had a surprise reaction: “I was quite shocked because it was much worse when I was there. When I went back to camps in 1987 they were eating big boxes of chicken, eating really well, but they were complaining about conditions.”
However, Gilder also acknowledged the subjectivity of the experiences he details in Songs and Secrets, concluding that, “This is my perspective on my window”.
Liesl Jobson tweeted from the launch using #livebooks:
Launch of Songs and Secrets by Barry Gilder at The Book Lounge bookslive.co.za/RVtL via @BooksLIVESA On my way there now.
— Liesl Jobson (@LieslJobson) June 21, 2012
Packed @book_lounge for launch of Songs & Secrets by @bpgilder. Jakes Gerwel & author #livebooks twitter.com/LieslJobson/st…
— Liesl Jobson (@LieslJobson) June 21, 2012
@bpgilder this book has been cleared by the state security agency. Not a kiss & tell, but have told unknown. Won’t be arrested! #livebooks
— Liesl Jobson (@LieslJobson) June 22, 2012
JG says it is a delightful read, marvellous combo of personal & political. Instructive history of exile & underground struggle. #livebooks
— Liesl Jobson (@LieslJobson) June 22, 2012
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Book details
- Songs and Secrets: South Africa from Liberation to Governance by Barry Gilder
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EAN: 9781431404360
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